Bowst Team
Okay, now here’s the deal
I’ll try to educate ya
Gonna familiarize
You with the nomenclature
Welcome back to On Point!
This Week @Bōwst
Jamie followed up with Fluffy the bunny and wrote a post about Drupal 8 themes and JavaScript.
As you will shortly see,I lost my mind and this On Point is filled with parodies, which will NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN. (Because some of them are … um … not very good, there is a key at the bottom of this post.)
Dare to be Drupal
THREE! THREE More Features in Drupal 8.2! Ah-ah-aaaaaah!
Drupal 8.2 is the future,
And it holds a little mystery
It has some more new features
In fact there are three
It’s a magic number
It’s got content moderation so you can keep a watchful eye
On published and unpublished pieces you might have on your site
It’s got a whole new datetime range
So you can add the proper dates
No more, no less,
You don’t have to guess
But I said three was the magic number
And so it is
The final one is outside in
Which is like inside out, only different
That makes three
A magic number
Hey, Yippie Yi Yo
Who let the Selective Watchdog Backend Module out? Who? Who? Who?
First World Programs
I am the Very Model of the Modern Reactivity…
…I’ve got your JavaScript in hand and execute it brilliantly!
I know the latest libraries and use them with impunity
and demonstrate dexterity by writing UIs beautifully.
I’m very well acquainted with the latest capabilities
and also know the most recent techniques and cool technologies.
When you say Reactive Programming I become visibly giggly
I am the very model of the modern reactivity!
Come Scale Away with Me
I’m scaling away, writing applications for you and me
They’ve got to be free, free to grow with user opportunities
As developer, I’m the captain, so climb aboard
I’ll build scalable React apps for all the best platforms
And I’ll try, yes how I’ll try, to carry on
(Re)Factor it In
You totally though that this was going to be another awesome song parody.
Nope.
Instead, here’s an article on JS refactoring techniques.
Designer’s Paradise
The Sharpest Tools in the Shed
Somebody once told me that my designs were boring
I needed more resources at hand
So I found some online tools and look at me now, fools
I’ve got the best designs in the land
I’m Soy Into You
Designin’ UX is like making sushi noms
You gotta chat your clients up and keep ’em calm
Make it simple make it better make it .com
(I don’t even know what I mean by that but it rhymes so it’s the bomb)
Crop it Like it’s Hot
Responsive typography doesn’t happen magically
You need to demonstrate your mastery
Bombastically, execute superior technicality
Getting it done, killing it systematically
NOW That’s What I Call Gadgets
Ringtone of Fire
My new phone burst into flame
Which frankly, is a pain
No texts, no calls for me
‘Cause I got the new Galaxy
My Galaxy Note just caught on fire
The recall came
As the flames went higher
And it burns burns burns
That phone of fire
That ringtone of fire
Get the Jack, Back, do it Again…
…iPhone 7 review has found
We want the jack back — earphone plugs are our friend.
Follow the Sequence, You Will
Well you know my name was Simon,
But I will answer to Vader too
Hit my buttons in the proper sequence
and I’ll play the Imperial March for you!
In Other News
Time for the Kobayashi Maru
Tumble out of bed
And stumble to the transporter
Reach into my pocket and get my tricorder
This five year mission is really wearing thin
Not in a red shirt
So I’m a survivor
Though I’m a good Enterprise-r, wish I’d scored a little higher
On my Starfleet exams for a different 9 to 5
This One Goes to 10
This would be an excellent place for a Spinal Tap parody. Imagine that there is one here, and then read this article about iOS 10 tips and tricks.
The Cartridge Family
I think I’m old school, Nintendo is what I’m made of
I’m afraid that game cartridges are kind of what I’m here for
They were the coolest! Back then they were the newest!
And they were so fun to play way back in the day.
And Finally …
THREE! THREE More Features in Drupal 8.2! Ah-ah-aaaaaah!: Schoolhouse Rocks!, “Three is a Magic Number”
Hey, Yippie Yi Yo: Baha Men, “Who Let the Dogs Out”
I am the Very Model of the Modern Reactivity: Gilbert and Sullivan, “I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General”
Come Scale Away with Me: Styx, “Come Sail Away”
The Sharpest Tools in the Shed: Smash Mouth, “All Star”
I’m Soy Into You: Fabolous featuring Ashanti, “I’m So Into You”
Crop it Like It’s Hot: Snoop Dog featuring Pharrell, “Drop It Like It’s Hot”
Ringtone of Fire: Johnny Cash, “Ring of Fire”
Get the Jack, Back, Do It Again: Steely Dan, “Do It Again”
Follow The Sequence, You Will: Captain Kangaroo, “Simon in the Land of Chalk Drawings Theme”
Time for the Kobayashi Maru: Dolly Parton, “9 to 5”
The Cartridge Family: The Partridge Family, “I Think I Love You”
